I hate to inflict this on anyone, but we need to talk about the Tiger Effing Woods scandal. We’re not going to talk about Woods himself. I really couldn’t give a flying fuck about him.
What I want to do is talk about the women.
First up, a real shocker from Jaimee Grubbs.
“To know, this whole time, two-and-a-half years… I thought that I could have been the only woman,” she goes on. “It hurts.”
You are never the only woman when he has a wife. You can never guarantee that you are the only other woman. It’s oxymoronic, with all that the bastardized non-term implies.
Jaimee Jungers, who has spoken about the affair on NBC’s Today Show had several things to say that leapt out at me.
First: “I was in love with him.”
Second: “I got nothing from this relationship – but a broken heart.”
By her description, she and Woods had an ongoing affair, something she’s described as “boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.” So why is statement #2 prefaced by “Nothing, I didn’t even get a birthday card. I got nothing out of this relationship but a broken heart.”
What the fuck, woman? She acknowledges, in that same interview with Meredith Vieira, that she knew Woods was recently married. To that she says, “I’m not raised to be… to do something like I did.” Well, she did it anyway.
HE WAS MARRIED. You loved him. You say it was a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, it was open enough that you went out together and people at the various studios let you in without layers of secrecy, but he couldn’t even send you a birthday card?
What was she thinking here? Either she’s a moron who told herself the lie that he would one day leave his wife for her, or she’s a calculating bitch who was just waiting for her chance to spill the beans for cash. Idiocy or callousness, which do you prefer, Ms. Jungers?
Final icing on the cake, Woods sounds like JFK squiring Marylin Monroe around DC while Jackie O. looks the other way.
“We went places together; people were taking our photographs in the nightclubs. When I went to see him at the MGM, I would have to check in under my name and say that I was there to see him, and Tiger would come down and get me.”
This implies that a lot of people out there were aware that Woods was spending time with at least one woman who was not his wife. How does something like that stay under the radar for years and years? Are all those ‘civilized’ golfers in their polo shirts actually just as randy as any other athlete?
When all is said and done, I keep returning to this one fact.
Tiger Woods isn’t even attractive.
So: WTF, ladies. I know power and fame are supposed aphrodisiacs, but really? Golf groupies? Come on.